Out, out damn'd CD!

In this age of digital music and instant downloads actual physical CD's are quickly becoming obsolete.  And not a moment too soon.  While I may find this post dating in the near future, for now I still feel comfortable asking you all to cast your mind back upon the last time you purchased an album.  Mine was "Muddy 'Mississippi' Waters Live" (I think).  It was an impulse buy from the oh-so-strategically positioned display rack right next to the register at Borders.
As a side note, whoever came up with the idea of those racks deserves his own personal hell where he gets to spend eternity trying to get children between the ages of 3 and 10 past one without a melt down.

But that is for another post...to get back on topic, are you thinking of  your last CD?  

Good.  Now, I know this is going to be painful, but try and think back about getting it open...

...You're remembering now, aren't you?  That shrink-wrapped plastic skin, enveloping all that music-y goodness in a perfect wall of impenetrability.  What did you try?  A knife?

Scissors?

A chainsaw?

Perhaps these?

Or these?

Eventually, after much swearing and frustration, you finally got it open.  By then, of course, you had lost any desire you ever had to actually listen to the CD...

But now...imagine this.  This is you:

You're alone in a room.  Nothing else there.  You have no teeth, no fingernails.  And a massive pile of brand new CDs that need to be opened.  

You have made it to the third circle of Hell...